Frequently Asked Stupid Questions
Not be to confused with the Stupid Q & A page. This one’s all about the stupid questions people ask about this website.
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Are you a real yogi?
Real enough to tell you that your third eye is just as blind as mine.
Can your advice really help me?
That depends. Can you help yourself? If you’re hoping my sarcastic insights will suddenly turn your life around, you’ve probably already hit rock bottom, and I’m honored to be the distraction you cling to. Take my advice seriously, and you’ll end up exactly where you are now—lost, but at least laughing about it.
Why should I buy your merch?
Because it’s hilarious, and wearing something with a snarky slogan is basically a public service. You’re doing the world a favor by advertising that not everyone is out there trying to be the next Buddha. Plus, it’s either that or another overpriced latte, and this has a much longer shelf life.
Are your blog posts supposed to be helpful?
I mean, I could lie and say yes, but we all know that’s not true. My blog posts are supposed to make you laugh, sigh, and maybe question why you’re taking advice from a stranger on the internet who openly mocks the concept of inner peace. If they help you, great. If not, at least you got a free dose of sarcasm.
Why is your site full of sarcasm?
Sarcasm is cheaper than therapy and more effective than screaming into a pillow. Also, it’s fun to point out the absurdity of life with a smirk. If you take everything seriously, you’re going to end up as one of those people who clutches a crystal and thinks it’ll solve their problems.
What if I’m offended by your content?
If you’re easily upset by jokes about the futility of human existence, stick to videos of cute little fuzzy animals.
What if I want to sue Rude Yogi?
You want to sue me, do you? Well, let me save you some trouble. Satire, my friend, is protected under the First Amendment—it’s all free speech and expression. And just so you know, I might have studied law purely out of spite, so I could be well-versed in these matters.
As for the use of real names in my material? Only public figures get the honor of being satirized here. If anyone else’s name pops up, it’s pure coincidence. So relax—this is all just good, old-fashioned sarcasm.
As for the age limit: I don’t rely on profanity to get my point across—that’s outdated and unoriginal. This site is perfectly age-appropriate, but let’s be real: if you’re under 18 or your parents still pay your bills, you probably won’t get most of it anyway.
How do I contact you?
You actually want to reach out? Brave. Use the Contact Form on this site. If you’re inquiring about a Rude Yogi product, you will get a prompt response. If you have a general question, comment, or complaint, I’ll respond whenever the universe aligns and I feel like pretending to care. Alternatively, you can try sending a message via social media, but don’t hold your breath—I’m usually too busy contemplating the absurdity of existence to check my notifications.